The First Amendment

I would like to make an amendment to resolution 17.  Saturday I joined a gym partly because it's going to get really hot here in a month or two and there is no way I'm going to be able to motivate myself to get outside and run, but mostly because that way I can use an elliptical machine instead of running.  I'm pretty good at working the system when I want to be.  Cheeky, I know.

At any rate, the membership came with two free sessions with a personal trainer and I had my first one yesterday.  Dan the training man kicked my butt, and I loved it.  I'm sore as heck today, but I was up at 5:15 and at gym by 5:45.  Still sore as heck but I don't mind in the slightest.  

Amendment: Work out at least 4 days a week.  

Closet Shopping

This week I made a concerted effort to shop from my closet. This meant finding things that I couldn't remember wearing in the last 3 months or longer. It was quite a success. Here are a few of my "new" purchases.

I'd only worn this dress once to a wedding this summer. I feel like it's a little big, but putting a sweater over it seemed to help. I'm not sold on the yellow sweater, but I liked the look. We don't get much of a spring here in Arizona (It's basically some variation of summer here all year long), but this outfit made me feel springy.

Dress: American Rag (Macy's)
Sweater: Gap
Tights: Merona (Target)
Heels: Old Navy
Pearls: Forever21
Bracelet: Old Navy


I actually used to wear this dress quite often, but I realized it had been a while when I pulled it out of my closet and my roommate went, "Oooh, I've never seen that before" (she has, but she has quite a bad memory). I've also only worn the vest once or twice. It's navy and for some reason I always have a hard time with navy.

Dress: Gap
Vest: Gap
Tights: Gap
Boots: Forever21
Necklace: Bridesmaid gift from my friend, Jill


I honestly don't know when I wore this top last. I have a hard time putting it with anything other than leggings. Same with the shoes. They're green gingham and I've probably only worn them twice. I love green, but it's hard to throw a gingham into many outfits. I don't wear the black skinny jeans often either because they are exactly what they say they are: skinny.

Top: Gap
Tank Top: Gap
Jeans: Old Navy
Shoes: Gap
Scarf as headband: Forever21
Necklaces: Forever21 and H&M


The necklaces aren't "new" but they're cheap and cheerful, and I wear them all the time!

Reality Check

After all the excitement and build up yesterday I checked my e-mail this morning to find a rejection from Arizona State University. What? This boggles my mind on so many levels.

Level 1: I have never been rejected from a university. For God's sake, I was accepted to the Anna Freud Centre, which is far more prestigious than ASU. Sorry, I'm just being a little bitter.

Level 2: Aren't we in a recession? Shouldn't these schools be accepting anyone that breathes and has a checkbook? I guess not. ASU has been hit really hard this year, and as my kind friend, Heather, said, "It's a bad year for anyone to get into ASU. You might have a very different outcome in a different year." This does make me feel somewhat better, but still...

Level 3: A rejection e-mail? How rude! What happened to a nice rejection letter? At least then you still have a little hope and don't feel like you're being slapped in the face. I mean, come on, the subject was "ASU deny letter". Damn, just because you have to make budget cuts doesn't mean you have to be rude.

Level 4: This isn't so much mind boggling as it is the reality check portion of today's event: I now have no choice but to move out of Phoenix. I can't put off doing my masters for another year. I have to get on with my life and ASU was my last reason to stay in Phoenix. Now all my eggs are in a Portland basket. Good thing there's no pressure or anything.

Oh Goodness...

This is not at all the blog I had planned for today, but I received some mildly exciting news that I feel I must share. I say mildly because it has potential to be extremely, but not just yet. I don't like to jinx things, so I have to keep this low key. I'm a firm believer that if you get too excited about something it probably isn't going to happen. I know, it's kind of a sad way to look at life, but I can't help being superstitious. Anyway, I digress...

Today I had an e-mail from the admissions office at Lewis & Clark (my first choice for grad school) inviting me to interview. When I read the e-mail all my insides went "ooohhhhh" and my heart maybe stopped beating for 2-3 seconds. Since the school is in Portland I have to do a phone interview and these make me a little nervous. I can honestly say I think I have a pretty stellar personality, but I worry that it doesn't come off right over the phone. I use a lot of facial expressions and hand gestures to accompany my personality, and those just can't be translated telephonically. Although, when interviewing for a place at a university in England I was told that my honesty was refreshing. But ya know, the English think us Americans are so funny and they're so impressed when we're even mildly intelligent, so I can't really play that card here. On top of that, they ask that you write a one to two page essay on social justice and equity. Huh? Um, I'm applying for Marriage, Couple and Family Therapy. I guess another opportunity to play the "I lived in London for five years" card and hopefully BS my way into a master's program.

Cross your finger (toes, legs, arm, etc), say a prayer and throw some positive energy out into the universe for me. Please and thank you.

Limit Two Per Person, Please

It has to be said that my dad can be a pretty smart guy. Throughout college we had a standing date for our Sunday phone conversation and I can't even begin to count how many times I was hungover on Sundays. I have always been very honest with both of my parents, so my dad knew exactly what I meant when I said I was feeling "a little under the weather". Never one to scold my dad would chime in with "The night before is never worth the morning after" and "Everything in moderation, Kelly". I never listened.

As I've gotten older "under the weather" has gotten far worse for far longer. I am not exaggerating when I say that after 23 hangovers became an event. I'm talking in bed all day, two-day headaches with lots of visits to the royal thrown. Especially good hangovers will include sweating, moaning in pain, lots of junk food and plenty of self-loathing. I'm generally useless for at least 12 hours of the day and am genuinely unpleasant to be around. And nowadays a hangover is pretty much a given if I consume more than a few drinks, but I just keep drinking. It doesn't even make sense to me.

So at 26 I think I might finally start listening to my dad. Don't get me wrong, I have a good time when I go out with friends, but I have never - NEVER - had a hangover that was worth it. Never. I've yet to wake up with a throbbing head and a queasy stomach and think, "Wow, I'm really glad I had that last shot of tequila". Then there's the money aspect. I am literally paying to make myself sick. How does that make sense? I don't even need my dad to tell me that it doesn't. And don't even get me started on all the useless calories I'm consuming!

Now I'm sure you're thinking, "Dang, this girl is a lush". I'm really not. I maybe go out once a week, but the once a week hangover that is almost sure to follow makes it feel like I'm getting hammered every night. It really just isn't worth it to me anymore, so I have decided to mandate a two drink limit. This will mean no more wasting my weekends in bed, growing a beer belly and throwing my money away. Maybe I'll even start a Asia travel fund or a tattoo fund or shopping fund or a new hobby fund with all my saved money. Really, the possibilities are endless.

I'm Just Not That Into You

In honor of tomorrow being the most deplorable holiday known to man I decided to give a little blog time to a recent trend in my life. At the risk of sounding mildly conceited, I have to say that the only guys that seem to be into me these days are guys that I am not into. I'm not trying to say that I'm sitting here fighting guys off with a stick, but just that the only guys that have really expressed interest in me have been guys that I have little to no interest in. Now in their defense, I am ridiculously picky but am also very friendly. Apparently this confuses them, so I'm going to make it a little easier; I've prepared a list.

I'm just not that into you if...

I don't laugh at your jokes. A good sense of humor is paramount for me. If you can't make me laugh you're just wasting your time. But don't get confused, just because I laugh at your jokes doesn't automatically mean I'm into you either.

I don't give you my number, but insist if you give me yours I will call you. I'm not calling you. Please! If I don't give out my number what would make you think I'd call yours? I will however keep it in my phone so later on I can go through my numbers and play the "who the heck is this guy" game.

I'm constantly looking at my friends while talking to you. This means I'm trying to telepathically tell them to "Help me!!!!!!".

you think money is a substitute for kindness. There is absolutely no substitute for kindness. None. I don't need your money. I'm not interested in your money or where you can take me or what you can buy. I'm interested in you being kind and genuine.

I have ever refered to you as a douche bag. You're never coming back from that, sorry, buddy. I've seen enough DBs in my day to know that once a DB, always a DB. That's just the way the world works. But hey, we can be friends.

you tell me you want to *ahem* me and I laugh. Or say "That's sweet, but..." First of all, I'm not that kind of girl. Second of all, WTF?! You think if you tell me that I'll just go "Oh yeah, ok, let's go". I won't...ever.

you ask if you can kiss me. If you have to ask the answer is always no. Always. This is primarily an English thing, but I don't want this trend picking up with any American guys. You aren't being polite, you're being a wet rag. No girl wants a wet rag.

you call me girl, babe, sweetie, honey or any other term of endearment. Let's get this really cleared up...I am not your sweetie; especially if you just met me.

you've decided after spending a few hours with me that you've got me all figured out. You don't. It is not a secret or a surprise to anyone that I don't really know that I want. I do however know what I don't want and that's enough for me.

you're putting yourself down. Self-confidence is very attractive. Self-deprecation is not. Be careful though, there is a fine line between self-confidence and cockiness.

you touch me and a flinch or pull away. I'm actually an extremely touchy-feely person, but I have a weird thing about being touched by guys I'm not into. If I'm not interested don't get in my personal space. I know it's extremely, but I can't fake it.

I give you a high 5 or fist bump when I see you. If I like you I'm going to want to hug you. High 5s are for friends.

you took more time getting ready to come out than I did. I care alot about the way I dress, but I don't necessarily spend loads of time getting ready. How I dress is an extension of my personality, not a sign that I'm high maintenance. You with all the gel and the Ed Hardy, you're high maintenance and that is not attractive in any way.

my girlfriends don't like you. They can be wrong, but I'm really not willing to sacrifice time with them for a guy, so you're kinda screwed.

I could probably keep going, but I'll stop at 14 (in honor of Valentine's Day). Please, don't confuse this list for me being a raging bitch that is totally full of herself. I know that there have been plenty of guys that haven't been into me, so really I'm just evening the score. Remember, I'm not only picky but I'm also a little angry and very closed off. But perhaps making this list will have a theraputic effect for me...or perhaps not.

Falling Behind

I'd say in general I am quite proud with my progress on these 26 resolutions I've made for myself. Don't believe me? Ok, well then let's review:

1. Saturday I donated a bag of clothes to Goodwill.
2. Sunday I bought oranges and yesterday I actually peeled and ate one on my own. Yes! It was a big day.
3. I'm currently booking my trip to San Francisco for late April/early May.
4. I have read BBC every day since my birthday (minus the weekends because nobody wants to read the news on the weekends).

I'm getting there, but I've also realized there are a few resolutions that have been entirely neglected. Like I have yet to pick up my journal since turning 26, which is actually quite out of character for me. I may have become a deadbeat journaler (yeah, that's right, I make up my own words) over the past couple of years, but I have always been good about writing about important events. I think all the pressure has gotten to me. Or perhaps it is all the blogging that has gotten in the way. Hard to say.

I have been just as bad about reading. I even gave myself a head start as I started reading Brick Lane last month. I haven't read a page in February. I'd like to blame this on my busy social calendar, but really I think it's just laziness. Foiled again!

I did take my reusable grocery bags to Fresh and Easy with me Sunday night, but that has been the extent of that. I feel bad because surely Mother Earth is crying over my forgetfulness. Clearly I just need to start carrying a bigger handbag in order to house my vast array of reusable shopping bags. Shhhh, with you're "Why don't you just leave them in your car" business. That would require far too much foresight.

So I soldier on in hopes that once I get myself organized (Resolution 26) things will just magically fall into place. I will instantly be able to check every resolution off of my list and live a happy, full and complete life. Oh, except Resolution 14 (go on a date), that's still last on my list of priorities.

Wardrobe Revamp

It has to be said, I have a terrible habit of buying clothes and/or accessories that I either never wear or only wear once and then forget I own. I have on more than one occasion taken items to Buffalo Exchange with the tags still on them. This is essentially throwing money down the drain.

So in an attempt to be more financially responsible, instead of shopping for new clothes in the stores I decided to go shopping for new clothes in my closet. Sunday morning I went for brunch with friends and this is what I came up with. I hadn't worn the dress in months and usually wore it with silver accessories, but I am broadening my fashion horizons and taking one from the English fashion book: black and brown together. I know, many Americans would say this is a crime against fashion, but let's get with the times folks. It's 2009 and brown and black can now be friends. Just try it, you might like it.

Dress: Gap
Belt: Gap (never been worn)
Tights: Merona (Target)
Necklaces: Forever21 and H&M
Boots: Forever21

Resolution #26: Be More Organized

It didn't take me long to come up with my 26th resolution, did it? It struck me this week that I really need to get my life in order. It's quite the juxtaposition: I'm totally OCD but I'm also chronically unorganized. I lose things regularly. I'm especially bad when it comes to grown up things like paying bills, insurance or generally anything that really matters. It's not that I'm irresponsible; I know I need to take care of these things, but I am just not organized enough to take care of them in a timely manner.

So in an attempt to be a more organized grown up today I bought a file for all my important documents. Now I just need to clean my house to find all of said documents so that I can file them away. I'm all about cleansing my chi and I feel like this will be a very good opportunity to do that. And I also have this sick passion for organizing things (I like cleaning the refrigerator and dusting so I can put things back on to shelves. Weird, I know.), so hopefully this will also help me on my journey to become more organizationaly sound.

The Love of My Life

I'll admit it, I'm a sucker for my dog. She's 100% spoiled and I do genuinely treat her like she is my child. I can't help it she's amazing. Knowing this has lead me to think that if I could find a man as awesome as Hendrix I might not be quite so angry. Well, I'd probably still be a little angry, but I might be willing to actually go on a date or at least give the guy my number. You laugh, but let me tell you about how rockin my dog is.

She has a ridiculous amount of personality. I'm sure others have said this about their dogs, but they are lying. Hendrix has them all beat! She's just really freaking funny. And she dances! Naturally it's a booty dance that involves walking around in a circle. All I have to do is shake my butt at her and she goes crazy. Don't worry, I have plans to video tape it and make it a You Tube hit. And don't even get my started on the wrinkle face (the vet says she's smiling)...you just have to see it to believe it.

She's loyal. Ignorant people are constantly taking smack about pit bulls but what they don't realize is that they are one of the most loyal breeds around. I adopted her from the pound where I was told she was a stray. Naturally, I was worried that she would be a runner, but that couldn't be farther from the truth. She does sometimes get curious and walk a little further out of the yard than I'd like, but she's never once tried to run away. One morning on our walk she was being a bit of a pill and got out of her collar. I freaked! But the brilliant dog that she is, she ran back to the yard and waited for me. She's knows who loves her, so why would she want to run away?

She's kind. Ok, this might be a bit of an exaggeration, but stay with me here. She has no problems with sharing her food, water or toys with other dogs. If you're having a rough day she gives you a hug. Well, maybe more you give her a hug, but she hugs back. I swear.

She's an amazing cuddler. I swore before I got a dog that I was not going to let it sleep with me. Beds are for people, blah, blah, blah. Then when I found out that my pit bull mix puppy was not actually a puppy (she was at least a year old when I adpoted her) and was full grown that all went out the window. The only way to accurate way to describe her is snuggle bug. I'm a side sleeper so most nights she girls herself in next to me, but when she's extremely tired there are time when she will sleep on top of me. I know it sounds ridiculous, but she's so warm that it's like a blanket (if you know me well you know I sleep with a lot of covers, even in the summer). And when I wake up in the morning she's all sleepy and warm, it's adorable. Ok, I'll stop before anyone decides it's time to commit me.

She's great with kids. I think all new dog owners, especially of pound dogs, are a little nervous the first time their dog comes into contact with a kid. You just never know how they are going to react, but Hendrix loves them. If someone is walking with a stroller she has to peer in as we're walking past. When we go for walks in the morning and see the kids on their way to school she gets so excited she pees (Sadly, once on a kid's book bag, oops).

She's so stinkin cute it hurts. She is undeniably a really cute dog. There really is no need to say more.

She likes to do the same things as me. Granted she doesn't really get a say in the matter, but she likes to hike and be outside. She also enjoys a good nap and having a lie in. Plus, she likes the same TV shows as me (she spends her days watching TLC and BBC America). What more could a girl ask for?

Does this sound like anyone you know? Probably not, so don't try to set me up with anyone unless he meets all of the above criteria.

It Looked Better in My Head

Anyone who knows me really well knows that I put a lot of time and effort into most of my outfits. Usually the last thought on my mind as I'm drifting off to sleep is what outfit I'll wear the next day. Today was no exception. I had a pretty fantastic idea in my head, but wasn't entirely sure of it's execution.

I woke up late, as usual, but had an extra wrench throw into the equation. My adorable roommate came home still drunk at 7:15 (yes, in the am) and was being ridiculously funny and distracting. I put on the outfit without much of a thought and walked out the door. Only to realize when I got to work that maybe I should have thought twice. Bottom line: cream leggings are only for Halloween costumes (at least for me).

Calling in Back-up (Res. #3)

I have never been one for fad diets because I hate the idea of depriving myself of anything. The thought of having to give up chocolate for life so I can lose five pounds is depressing and makes me want to go eat chocolate. Any time I have lost weight in the past it has been through the amazing diet of eating healthy and exercising. Crazy!! I know, I should probably write a book about it.

Knowing this has worked for me many times in the past gives me hope, but sadly it doesn't give me motivation. I have no desire to get up at 5am every morning so I can go to the gym and my evenings are taken up with an hour walk with Hendrix and friends or relaxing. These are things I am not willing to give up for the gym. So what is a girl to do? Well, the solution has come to me via the interwebs (that thing is so amazing). After talking to a co-worker I've jumped on a bandwagon I didn't even know existed. It's called myfooddiary.com and it's heading to Weight Loss Town. Population: Kelly.

It's super simple. You create your log-in and are able to get started right away. No waiting around for a confirmation e-mail or any of that BS. How it works is simple too. You just enter in everything you eat each day and the amount of exercise you do. They have an amazing food database with 50,000 foods or you can add your own. You can even create a fridge where you can store the foods you eat most often. The exercise bit is just as easy. There's a list of 700 exercises - including some things you would never even consider exercise. Example: birdwatching. Huh? You put in all this info and presto it gives you a report for each day telling you where you've done well and where you haven't done so well. There's even cute little smiley and frown faces. How encouraging is that?! We'll have to wait and see (pun intended).

This is what I'm working with...

Wait!!

In my own defense, I did spend a good 20-30 minutes yesterday reading http://news.bbc.co.uk/. So I did start, I did, I did! I am not a failure.

Motivation...or Lack Thereof

Everyone knows that you don't start a New Year's resolution on January 1, so in the same turn I had no intention of starting any of my resolutions yesterday. I did not feel guilty. Why should I? It was my birthday!

Today though is another story. I had visions of waking up early today and going for a jog, but even last night I new better and set my alarm for the regular 6.30 wake up. And, as per usual, I barely rolled out of bed at 6.45. I place all blame on Hendrix who is supremely lazy in the morning and a cozy little snuggle bug to boot. But then I remember that she's the dog and I'm the master so that's not really fair. Foiled! I have no one to blame but myself.

All is not lost though. I fully intend to at least start organizing my room tonight. The biggest problem I've had since moving into to 1035 is closet space. I know, I know I should stop shopping or get rid of some of my clothes, but at this juncture these are simply not options. However, as luck would finally have it, I've inherited a second closest. Awwwwwwwwwwww! (That's the sound of angels singing.) So on the agenda tonight is a bit of an early spring clean out/moving in to said closet. I'm actually excited for this, so fingers crossed that will keep me motivated!

And so it begins...

Every year I struggle to come up with a New Year’s resolution. Partly because I know that the chances of me actually following through with one are ridiculously slim and also because I feel that another year on the calendar is not nearly as important as another year of my life. With that in mind, I usually opt to make a birthday resolution. Usually it is something small and manageable, but something that I feel will actually make a difference to my life for that year.

This year I’m aiming high! I’m combining this birthday resolution idea with my dream to someday write a blog that will make me famous and I came up with 26 Resolutions for My 26th Year. I’m not talking crazy famous, just maybe appearing on Oprah and signing a book deal. Heck, I’d even settle for some free stuff instead (I toyed with the idea of a fashion blog because a well-read one can get you some swag but there are just waaaaaay too many already).

Without any further ado, here is the list (stay with me folks, it’s kind of long):

1. Regularly keep up a blog about my resolution. This seems easy, but as some of you may already know this is my second attempt at blogging.
2. Be less angry and closed off. This one has shocked a lot of people but it’s actually a New Year’s resolution I’ve tried several years running. I put up a good front but really I’m quite cynical and angry. Mostly when it comes to relationships and dating, but also just people in general. I’m not often convinced that people are inherently good and I pretty much don’t trust anyone. Not good.
3. Get down to a size 8. Don’t get me wrong, I’m actually pretty happy with my body but I want to see if I have the commitment and self-control to get my butt into a single digit size pair of jeans. Plus, just once I’d like someone to say, “You’re looking a little thin”.
4. Properly train my dog, Hendrix. 90% of the time she is the sweetest dog you’ll ever meet, but the 10% of the time that she isn’t she’s a little terror.
5. Make my family a bigger priority.
6. Start my masters. I’ve been putting it off for years, but I’m ready to actually start the rest of my life and getting my masters is a key component in that.
7. Be more financially responsible. Basically, I spend money like it’s going out of style. I have a closest FULL of shoes and clothes yet I still buy more. Yes, I do have a pretty fabulous wardrobe but this is not really helping me pay my bills.
8. Focus my chi by keeping my living space clean. In general I’m a pretty tidy person, but I have been known to let my room get a little out of control and this stresses me out. I always feel so much clearer and happier when my space is organized, so it just makes sense to keep it that way all of the time.
9. Travel to Asia. I have a few friends living there now and why not take advantage of a free place to stay?
10. Finish my back tattoo. This maybe goes against #7 and possibly #5, but it’s something I really want to do. Sorry, parental units!
11. Make a donation a month to Goodwill. This goes really well with #8 and I currently have 3 bags full and ready to go. The hardest part will actually just be getting myself to Goodwill.
12. Send one actual letter a month. What ever happened to the art of writing a letter? I’ve always loved writing letters and there’s no time like the present to start up again. Check your mailboxes, friends.
13. Read at least one book a month. Again, this is something I used to do all the time but have gotten out of the habit of. I have several at home waiting to be read, but I’m always open for suggestions.
14. Go on a date. I have to admit I’m only doing this to shut up my friends and mother, but I guess it is part of #2. Don’t be surprised if this one gets resolved last.
15. Read the newspaper or an internet news sources daily. Sadly, I’m more up on celebrity gossip than is necessary and this doesn’t really help increase my intelligence.
16. Donate my hair to Locks of Love. I’m not gonna lie, I’m pretty in love with my hair. I’ve been growing it out for over 2 years and love having long hair, but it’s a great charity and hair grows back.
17. Run at least 1.5 miles four days a week. Hopefully this will help with #3.
18. Journal once a week. I’ve kept a journal since I was 10, but have not been very good at keeping up with it in recent years.
19. Go to San Francisco. I have at least half a dozen friends living up there that I’ve promised to visit at least half a dozen times.
20. Take a roadtrip longer than 3 hours each way.
21. Find a new hobby. I’m very open to suggestions here.
22. Start eating oranges on my own. Definitely the most ridiculous, but very viable. As a kid my dad always peeled my oranges for me and as an adult I’ve found that I just can’t be bothered to do it myself. Ridiculous.
23. Go to a movie by myself. I moved to a foreign country by myself at 19, but I can’t seem to bring myself to sit in a move theatre alone. Sad, but true.
24. Only use reusable or recycled shopping bags.
25. Visit at least 2 states I haven’t already. Growing up my parents were awesome about making sure we saw America. I’ve been to all but 13 states.
26. Come up with a 26th resolution. Who knows what could happen between now and February 1 of next year that might need resolving?